A FARMER STOPPED BY THE LOCAL MECHANICS SHOP TO HAVE HIS TRUCK FIXED. THEY COULDN'T DO IT WHILE HE WAITED, SO HE SAID HE DIDN'T LIVE FAR AND WOULD JUST WALK HOME......
ON THE WAY HOME HE STOPPED AT THE HARDWARE STORE AND BOUGHT A
BUCKET AND A GALLON OF PAINT. HE THEN STOPPED BY THE FEED STORE AND
PICKED UP A COUPLE OF CHICKENS AND A GOOSE. HOWEVER, STRUGGLING OUTSIDE
THE STORE HE NOW HAD A PROBLEM - HOW TO CARRY HIS ENTIRE PURCHASES HOME.
WHILE HE WAS SCRATCHING HIS HEAD HE WAS APPROACHED BY A LITTLE OLD
LADY WHO TOLD HIM SHE WAS LOST. SHE ASKED, 'CAN YOU TELL ME HOW TO GET TO
1603 MOCKINGBIRD LANE ?' THE FARMER SAID, 'WELL, AS A MATTER OF FACT, MY FARM
IS VERY CLOSE TO THAT HOUSE I WOULD WALK YOU THERE BUT I CAN'T CARRY THIS LOT.'
THE OLD LADY SUGGESTED, 'WHY DON'T YOU PUT THE CAN OF PAINT IN THE
BUCKET. CARRY THE BUCKET IN ONE HAND, PUT A CHICKEN UNDER EACH ARM AND
CARRY THE GOOSE IN YOUR OTHER HAND?' 'WHY THANK YOU VERY MUCH,' HE SAID AND
PROCEEDED TO WALK THE OLD GIRL HOME.
ON THE WAY HE SAYS 'LET'S TAKE MY SHORT CUT AND GO DOWN THIS
ALLEY. WE'LL BE THERE IN NO TIME.' THE LITTLE OLD LADY LOOKED HIM OVER
CAUTIOUSLY THEN SAID, 'I AM A LONELY WIDOW WITHOUT A HUSBAND TO DEFEND
ME.. HOW DO I KNOW THAT WHEN WE GET IN THE ALLEY YOU WON'T HOLD ME UP
AGAINST THE WALL, PULL UP MY SKIRT, AND HAVE YOUR WAY WITH ME?'
THE FARMER SAID, 'HOLY SMOKES LADY! I'M CARRYING A BUCKET, A
GALLON OF PAINT, TWO CHICKENS, AND A GOOSE. HOW IN THE WORLD COULD I
POSSIBLY HOLD YOU UP AGAINST THE WALL AND DO THAT?' THE OLD LADY REPLIED, 'SET
THE GOOSE DOWN, COVER HIM WITH THE BUCKET, PUT THE PAINT ON TOP OF THE BUCKET,
AND I'LL HOLD THE CHICKENS.'
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