Next to go.

          I thought I was. Even at the tender age of 40 I thought I would be next to go. Why? Because I couldn't bear the pain of another loss? After all at the tender age of 40 I had lost many. The sorrow remains with me. I have lost those whom have left before their time. As much as I know. Brothers, friends, lovers, artists and strangers I had loved and respected all left before their time. It is a long list. Yours may be longer. The list can only be determined by the time spent recounting our loss.
          I recall determining within my self that I would be the next to go. And months later attending the funeral of my brother. Older but in his prime. And a year later the funeral of a younger cousin. I have lost mothers and one father before I spent 30 yrs on earth. We can expect to lose our parents. But to lose three mothers and a father in just 30 years of life aint right. It just aint right!
          Still there are those in my life whom may leave before me. People I have never met, but whom have enlightened me, comforted me, or brought joy to my life will go. Without giving me a chance to say "Thank you" or "Hello".
          My loss. Tired of losing. Such is life. Who will be the next to go?